Are You a Selfish, Self-Centered Leader?
It's a trick question.....
At first glance, this might seem like a riddle or a playful jab at leadership behavior. But dig deeper, and you'll discover it's actually a profound inquiry into the very foundation of authentic leadership and personal integrity.
The Language Trap We've All Fallen Into
We've been programmed to believe that being "selfish" and "self-centered" are the same thing. They're tossed around as synonyms, usually with shame attached. But here's what I discovered when I went back to the source of these words—they're not just different, they're actually opposing forces.
Breaking Down "Selfish"
The suffix "-ish" means "kind of like" or "somewhat resembling." Think about it: someone acting "childish" is behaving kind of like a child, but isn't actually a child.
So "selfish" means behaving kind of like the self, but not actually being the self. It's being inauthentic. It's your ego, your false persona, your fabricated identity trying to get its needs met.
Understanding "Self-Centered"
Self-centered means being centered in your true self. Grounded. Authentic. Operating from your core essence rather than from programmed responses or people-pleasing patterns.
The Integrity Connection
Here's where it gets interesting. Remember what integrity actually means? According to Oxford: "The state of being whole and undivided. Internal consistency."
For true integrity, we need our four primary parts working together:
Life force sends information to the heart
Heart registers and sends it to the mind
Mind interprets and creates the plan
Body puts it into action
The heart is the king. The mind is the governing general. Not the other way around.
The Leadership Revolution
So what does this mean for leadership?
A selfish leader operates from their ego, their false self, their programmed responses. They're disconnected from their authentic truth and make decisions based on fear, control, or external validation.
A self-centered leader operates from their true center, their authentic self. They're connected to their inner wisdom, their moral compass, their genuine purpose. They lead from integrity.
The Brave Heart Question
Which leader would you rather follow? Someone operating from their fabricated persona (selfish) or someone operating from their authentic center (self-centered)?
Which leader would you rather be?
The world has conditioned us to be ashamed of being "full of self"—but what if being full of your authentic self is exactly what the world needs? What if your true self, operating with integrity, is your greatest gift to others?
The Bottom Line
Being a self-centered leader isn't about ego or narcissism. It's about having the courage to be who you truly are, to operate from your center, to lead with integrity rather than from programmed responses.
It's about having a brave heart—one that rules from truth and authenticity.
So I'll ask you again: Are you a selfish, self-centered leader?
If you're operating from your false self, seeking validation, making decisions from fear—you're being selfish.
If you're operating from your true center, connected to your authentic purpose, leading with integrity—you're being self-centered.
And the world desperately needs more self-centered leaders.
The question isn't whether you're selfish or self-centered. The question is: Are you brave enough to find your center and lead from there?
What does integrity mean to you? Are you operating from your authentic center, or from programmed responses? The choice, as always, is yours.
I'm assembling a BETA pilot program for a select group of entrepreneurial leaders, creatives, and visionary minds who are ready to operate from truth, integrity, authenticity, and silent power.
Introducing The Pivot Point
This isn't just another program—it's a gateway experience to a more exclusive, high-level learning circle. A rare opportunity to co-create something extraordinary while receiving deeply personalized guidance.
What it is: A high-integration 6-week experience designed to help you find your deepest, undeniable, unshakable core truth.
Who it's for: Those who sense there's a more congruent, powerful way of living and leading—and are ready to step into it.
What makes this special: This pilot will be sculpted specifically for those who sign up. You won't just be taking a program; you'll be helping shape it.
If you're curious about operating from your authentic center rather than programmed responses—if you're ready to lead from integrity rather than ego—this is a rare chance to be part of something from the ground up.
Ready to step in? DM me or reach out. Let's talk.
This first round will be tailored specifically to those who have the courage to lean in.
It's the trusting isn't that's tricky. that quiet delicate inner voice that doesn't or yell or demand attention - just sits there - waiting...
I think you’re spot on with this statement and clarifying of terminology wakes us up, to what’s alive in us and what we can see going on in the world around us. We often fall into the old patterns because they’re like old friends, a hand in the glove so to speak. But I think we’re so much more if we can listen and trust the little voice inside - which for me is a very soft whisper which I have to slow down and consciously give time to listening to.